Weirdness

Okay, so I haven't posted in like a gazillion days. Shoot me. I can't always find the time, even though I really want to. I guess if I spent half the time writing on here as I do reading everyone else's blog, I could squeeze it in. But, eh. I digress.

Today something happened to me three times, and when something happens three times to me in one day, it makes me want to blog about it. What is it, you may ask? Oh, it's some pretty compelling stuff!

As I have said before, I work on a college campus, so I see a lot of people during the day. Three times today I have passed someone in the hall, or on the sidewalk and said hello. They said, "hello, how are you?" and I have said "I'm good. How are you?" and they continued to walk without answering. Now I understand that this it is just a formality to say "hi how are you", or some variation thereof, but why is it that so many people fail to answer the question? Is it just me? Is it possible that people really don't care about your answer, and so therefore choose not to answer you? I know this happens all the time, but since it happened so many times today, it got me thinking. Has anyone ever though of why this is? So weird the way us humans interact sometimes!

On another note, I told one of my co-workers today that we had ttc'd in the past. Something I had never told anyone besides my wife, the doctor and, well, all none of you. It sort of slipped out during conversation, and now I wish I could take it back. It's like I let out a huge secret, one my partner and I only shared. Granted, we never said we wouldn't tell anyone, but it just felt wrong. I felt like crying after I said it. Not sure why. Maybe because it didn't work. Maybe because I was feeling vulnerable. Maybe because I am PMSing. I told her not to tell anyone, and she swore she wouldn't. It's so weird because it's not like it's such an unusual thing, ttc'ing, it's just for me, it's a private thing. I guess I didn't want to tell anyone unless it worked. That way there would be no added pressure.

My wife has told me we can try again. It was just out of the blue. She still doesn't want another child, but she said she felt she shouldn't try and take that away from me. I agree, of course, but it makes me apprehensive. It's what I've wanted for so long, but it's nerve racking...what if it works? What if she leaves me? What if she ends up resenting me? Needless to say, my apprehension has caught her off guard too. I think we will try again. I just can't see myself passing this up. I know she loves me. She says she wouldn't leave me. But it's still scary as hell!